Finding a Submissive BDSM


This erotic sex story published on Nov 11, 2008 was written by Sextails and is from our Sexuality Articles section.
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"There are many aspects of looking for the right submissive partner"
There are many aspects of looking for the right submissive partner. As I have spoken to many people thru out the years I always make a point to explain in detail what they need and how they can achive what they want.

I have listed a general number of topics to look for to finding what is right for you.

1) Communication Ask questions to the most detail. Anything that is important to you should be asked.

2) Trust Building trust start at the beginning of getting to know your partner. Learn to build a base to grow with. It may take weeks to get to a comfortable level of trust. Enjoy the experience.

3) Look & Listen The person that you pick to be your partner must know who you are, train him/her to listen. Watch there body language to see how they respond with no words.

4) Training You must show the submissive that you are in charge. Train him/her to know what you want/need to be done. Do not let the submissive top from the bottom.

5) Pain As many may know pain plays a factor with in the BDSM play. Pain can be mild to extreme. I have always taught when learning to play start with at slow pace and build up to a point that suits both.

6) Pleasure In all mean the over laying of pleasure during the time that you give out the pain aspect is need to learn that what was once pain can turn to be the most pleasurable experience a submissive can have. Training the submissive to enjoy the experience.

7) Exploring As time goes on the exploring of new and exciting experience progress. It opens new avenues of expression. Learn that sexuality a pleasurable experience and that you can explore beyond your means.

8) Limits Everyone have limits. And as time goes on they will change and you are exposed to more experiences. Keep a open mind. Never feel that its beyond your means. Know what you want to fulfill your inner self.

9) Safety Always play safe. Use safe words. Respect the limits with who you play with. For this is not a game. It's about finding who you are and growing with in the greatest experience that you can have. Play with a person that is educated in what BDSM is really all about.

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