Society and Sex
Publish Date: Nov 8, 2008
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So what is the actual reality of women and sex? It took me ages to realize this, but women are much more sexual than men. In fact, they are much more sexual than most men can ever imagine.
To get an idea of this, read any women's sexual fantasy book. Women's sexual fantasies are much more developed than just about any mans. They can be elaborate and emotional and very descriptive and powerful. They incorporate taboo subjects, such as being dominated or in bondage and can be very slutty.
So why do most of us think that women don't like sex that much. I feel that parents teach their girls that you must be in love and in a committed relationship or married for sex. So their daughter will not go out and have sex and get pregnant. Society also says that a woman who really loves sex is a slut. Men are studs if they have a lot of sex with many women. A woman that has multiple partners is called a slut. This is why that even although a women love sex they will not admit this to someone that they do not know. Women do not want to be treated as objects.
Many women and some men too have had sexual abuse in their past. Some of us have had religious guilt about sex and masturbation. These factors can cripple the enjoyment of sex and intimacy. It takes a lot of healing before sex can be really enjoyed after abuse. I feel all of us have had some negative conditioning about sex. You were born as the result of an orgasm. Why not celebrate that fact! Other societies have celebrated the sex orgasms. Why not western societies?
When you walk down the street, do you hear men and women having orgasms? Not usually. Most of us block our sounds in sex due to our sexual shame. In my private practice as a sexologist, one aspect I suggest is to open up to the natural sounds during sex. If you block the sounds you block the full range of energy in your body.
In fact, I suggest to experiment making huge sounds into a pillow so not to deafen your lover. Men love a responsive woman that makes orgasmic sounds but most not want to do the same. Talking to women, I am surprised about how bad most men are as lovers. What is even more surprising is that most women put up with this!
Most men's orgasms are only a minute or two in length. However, a woman has the potential to have 2 to 3 hour orgasms even without stimulation. I have known several women that have explored the possibility of being orgasmic when working in an office! Most men do not realize this, but they can have orgasms without ejaculation. So I would like to leave you with the thought that women love sex. Women love to be naughty and slutty. Try some dirty talking during your next sexual experience.
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