Title: The Day My Uptown Girl Went Kinky On Me - Author: Timothy McCorkell
Published: Mar 11, 2007 - Contact:
It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon, we had just taken a stroll through Central Park, and were now headed to our favorite Cafe. But today, my Uptown Girl had a most peculiar, and devious look in her eyes.
I leaned over from my latte and told her that her eyes seemed to be thinking about something.
She replied, "yes, you are right as usual. I'm trying to remember if there is a hardware store somewhere around here."
I said, "there is a hardware store about 15 blocks away."
She gasped, "15 blocks. Are you sure there is nothing closer"
I laughed and said, "as the Uptown rents keep climbing, the hardware stores just keep getting further and further away."
She said, "15 blocks. After that I will reward myself with something high in calories."
We finished our latte and headed to the hardware store.
I asked, "what do you need to buy"
She replied, "clothes line and a very sharp pair of scissors."
When we got to the hardware store, she found the clothes line and scissors, and I went to hand her a pulley with that.
She said, "oh, why would I need a pulley"
I put the pulley back and thought to myself, "how strange that someone would buy a clothes line without a pulley. But then again, she's from Uptown and maybe they don't use pulleys."
Something didn't quite fit. She had a very good dryer, so I just couldn't figure why she would need a clothes line. But I was starting to tire from the walk and the partying the night before.
I just felt like taking a little knap. We got back to her apartment and had a few glasses of wine while listening to some soothing tapes. I felt very tranquil and started to close my eyes.
She said, "you look tired. Come and lay down on the bed."
I asked, "do you mind"
She said, "no, no problem. I'm tired to. I will join you in a while. I just have something to do first."
I noticed she had the windows wide open again, so, I took everything off but my shorts and pulled the covers over me.
Just as I started to dose I felt her hand shake me. She said, "take these two vitamins and when you wake up you'll feel better."
I said honey, "you know I never take vitamins."
She said. "do it for me."
She handed me a class of water and placed the pills in my mouth.
I said "okay. Just for you."
I fell into a deep sound sleep and didn't awaken again, until I felt the cold night air blowing on my chest.
I thought, "she must have knocked the covers off me, as she had so many times before."
I went to reach for the covers, but my hands could not move.
I opened my eyes, and found that my arms and legs were tied to the bed posts. I looked over and noticed her sound asleep beside me. I called her name and she started to wake.
She asked, "why are you waking me"
I replied. "why I'm all tied up"
She laughed and said, "oh that."
I said, "yes, oh that."
She replied, "you weren't supposed to wake up yet. Karen said those sleeping pills would knock you out for the whole night."
I said, "sleeping pills. I thought they were vitamins."
She laughed and said, "vitamins to make you sleep so I could tie you up and then do naughty things to you."
I said, "I woke up because I was freezing from all that cold air coming through the open window. And what naughty things are you planning to do to me"
She threw the cover over me, and said, "go back to sleep. You'll find out in the morning how naughty I will be."
I went back to sleep and I didn't wake up again until I heard the sound of an electric razor.
I opened my eyes and saw her standing over me with the electric razor. I asked, "why am I tied up And what are you doing with that electric razor"
She laughed, and said, "this is all part of the surprise I've been planning for you."
I laughed and said, "you mean, you really didn't buy that rope for a clothes line."
She laughed, and said, "oh, you're so perceptive."
Then she smiled and said. "you're always pleasuring me. I just wanted you to have 100% pleasure for a change, and I knew if you weren't tied up, you wouldn't let me go all the way through with my plans."
I laughed, and said, "plans, what do you mean plans"
She licked her lips seductively and said, "I've been thinking about this all week." I wanted to do something special for you for Valentines Day. Then I thought, I would do something that you would never do for yourself."
I said, "so you tied me up with the clothes line. Thats my Valentines Day surprise. I get it now, thats what you were whispering about to Karen on the telephone, and silly me, I just thought it was girl talk. So what other surprises did you and Karen plot together for me"
She laughed and said, "you have no idea what sort of surprises I have in store for you."
Then she came toward me with the electric razor. I said, "let me guess. You want to give me a haircut for a surprise."
She said, "a haircut yes. But not the kind of haircut that you would ever want."
Then she pointed the electric razor at my chest. I asked. "why are you pointing the electric razor at my chest"
She said, "I'm going to do something I know you would never do."
I asked, "whats that"
She said. "I'm going to shave your chest."
I said, "oh no your not," confident that I could break free of the rope.
But I was tied more tighly than I had imagined. I couldn't even budge. I asked. "how did you know how to tie a rope so good"
She smiled and said, "I once was a girl scout."
Then I said, "well, will you be a nice girl scout and kindly untie me now"
She laughed and said, "no way," as she moved the electric razor closer to my chest.
I said honey, "wait. Just wait. Let me explain this to you. Only weight lifters shave their chests."
But as I pleaded I felt the electric razor moving up my stomach. I pulled at the rope to get free, but it was futile.
I said, "please, don't." But the electric razor continued to run up my stomach.
Then I asked, "at least don't shave any further than my stomach."
She just laughed and said, "see, this is why I had to tie you up."
As I pulled again at the rope, she moved the electric razor up to my chest.
As I said, "no honey not my chest," I could feel the electric razor now advance up my chest.
She kept mowing up and down my chest with the electric razor until every last hair was gone. She then brushed the hair off with a damp towel. She smiled as if she had just won a prize and reached for a can of whip cream, and started to shake it with vigor.
I asked, "now, what are you going to do with that whip cream."
But she wouldn't answer and just kept shaking the can. She pointed the can at my now hairless chest and sprayed the whip cream all over me, and started rubing it all up and down my chest with her hands. She then climbed over me and started licking all the whip cream up with her tongue.
I was surprised, but with my newly mowed chest, I felt a tremendous arousal with each tongue stroke.
I told her, "I have to admit it. I'm feeling a nice sensation."
She said, "I've just barely started yet."
And then she moved her tongue deep inside my mouth, as I felt her hands running up and down my chest.
I told her that everything was great now and said, "lets call it a day."
She said, "I'm not finished yet," as her tongue now moved to my ear.
First, she tongued and blew in one ear and then the other ear. Then she got up and pulled something out of her night table draw. It was the extra sharp scissor, she had bought at the hardware store.
I said. "good. You're going to cut the rope off me at last."
She smiled and said, "I'm going to cut something off, but not the rope."
I said, "oh come on honey. Enough already."
She laughed and said, "not yet."
I said, "okay. What did you and Karen plan to do with the scissor when this plot was hatched"
She said, "the plan. Sorry, but I have to cut your shorts off."
I said, "you're going to ruin a perfectly good pair of shorts."
She said, "I don't want to untie you yet. And cutting your shorts off is the only other way I can give you your surprise."
As I started to say, "you are kidding right," she moved the scissors up the side of my shorts, and cut them away, and then slid them off me.
Then she pointed the can of whip cream, where the shorts had just been and sprayed.
I yelled, "oh honey. that feels cold."
She smiled and said, "you won't feel cold there for long."
Then she started to lick up all the whip cream with her tongue. She licked and licked and while she licked her hands were running all up and down my waist and thighs. My body started to shake with excitement, but the rope kept a firm grip on me.
Then with every inch of my body tingling, she climbed on top of me. It was Rocket Ships and the Forth Of July fireworks. She asked, "did you enjoy your surprise honey" As she untied me, I replied. "Oh yes, I enjoyed my surprise. Oh, did I ever enjoy my surprise."
She asked, "did you enjoy your surprise honey"
As she untied me, I replied. "Oh yes, I enjoyed my surprise. Oh, did I ever enjoy my surprise."