Title: Finding a Fuck Buddy - Author: Sextails
Published: Nov 3, 2008 - Contact:
People seek out fuck buddies for several reasons: theyre not ready or willing to have committed relationships, they want to increase their sexual experience, or maybe theyre just bored.
Recreational, commitment free sex can be a great experience but its not for everyone. Heres a beginners look at the experience of having a fuck buddy.
What exactly is a fuck buddy
A fuck buddy is someone you have casual sexual relations with, and there is a mutual agreement that both of you want sex from each other and nothing more. Sometimes, these originate from one-night stands, existing friends, and even personal ads. Regardless of how it starts, this kind of sexual relationship can be fulfilling if done right. However, a road to pain and heartache awaits those who break the ground rules. If you familiarize yourself with these rules and you firmly stick to them, your fuck buddy experience will prove to be a very positive one.
Rules on being successful fuck buddies
First of all, the sex should be enjoyable (if not great) for both of you. Thats kind of the point of the whole thing. Trust me, youre probably not even considered as fuck buddies if the sex part is bad. If thats the case, you could be called two people who pointlessly waste time and energy instead. Being fuck buddies should be pleasurable in the physical sense of the word, and it has to be this way for both parties if you want the passion to last.
Leave the trust and love to old married couples. You shouldnt expect to experience romantic relationship stuff like Valentine dates and marriage proposals from your fuck buddy. Dont impose exclusivity either keep in mind that your fuck buddy is not your boyfriend or girlfriend. Feeling jealousy for your fuck buddys significant other, etc. is also a big no-no. During your trysts, whenever you close the bedroom door, keep in mind that any emotional touchy-feely stuff should be left outside.
Although emotional attachments are frowned upon when it comes to fuck buddies, communication is very important. You should openly talk about things, especially about your relationship. Nothing ruins the fuck buddy experience like finding out that your fuck buddy was in love with you the whole time. Nip these things in the bud and discuss any potential feelings.
Do you know what you are doing with your fuck buddy next month If your answer is yes, then youre in big trouble. Dont make any future plans regarding your encounters keep in mind that every session could be your last. After all, planning leads to expectations, and weve already established that the only expectation you should have in this kind of relationship is only pleasurable sex and nothing else.
Keep the sex safe. Since its a leisurely, open relationship, it doesnt mean that you have to be cavalier about your attitudes towards protection. Remember that theres a no-exclusivity rule and that your fuck buddy could sleep with anyone he or she likes. Since you may not know exactly what your fuck buddy does without you, its better to be safe. Oh, and you dont want children unexpectedly popping out from your encounters either.
Be honest. If you have a significant other or if youre dating around, its best to be honest when asked about your relationship with your fuck buddy. Spare others from the details, but be clear about the existence of your relationship. Also, if you or your fuck buddy wants to sleep around during the span of your regular encounters, its best to tell each other about it to avoid any feelings of betrayal and jealousy.
What goes on in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. This rule exists for several reasons, the first being that society holds double standards for men and women. When women have fuck buddies, the closed-minded section of society sees them as sluts. If youre the woman in this type of relationship, you probably dont want that to happen, and if youre the man, you dont want the woman to get turned off by your kiss and tell attitude. Keep in mind that respect is the key to keeping the relationship positive. You also dont want to ignite all sorts of rumors just because of small details you divulged yourself. The best way to deal with the negative interference from others is to nip it in the bud keep things private (unless youre both exhibitionists).
Keep it short. There are times when having the same fuck buddy for three years may be considered as a long-term relationship. By keeping your relations short, you dont build expectations, and you avoid making long-term plans with your fuck buddy. Also, the intensity of your passions tends to falter as time goes by and if Friends or Seinfeld has taught us anything, its that you should end a good run at its peak. Dont let things drag on until youre bored. After all, you dont want the memory of a boring final sexual encounter hanging around in your brain.
All good things including thrilling commitment-free sex should come to an end. Maybe youll get bored, or youll fall in love with other people. In any case, if you were good friends to begin with, you could end up being closer and more open after the whole fuck buddy experience. Or you could effectively ruin the friendship. Just make sure that when you say your good-byes, you do it with respect for yourself and the other person. And no crying allowed. Its not a breakup with your long-term significant other. More importantly, no running after the other person trying to win them back. Its just the end of sex with one person, and not the end of your life.