Tips on How to Get a Girl or Woman Interested in You
Published: 09-Feb-16 Revised/Updated 05-Aug-17
List of tips on attracting girls by getting them to like you and how to keep them interested in you on a date.
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"You need to understand yourself. You are who you are, and will be attractive to some women, and unattractive to others, no matter what you do, who you know or how you act."
According to a recent study, 40 percent of men don't feel confident meeting a woman for the first time, so they often remain single and lonely for long periods of time.
One thing I have learned is that when you want a girl too much, you are bound to fail. Women like the chase as much as they like to be chased. In order to attract the attention, and interest, of a girl there are a few things you need to know first.
You need to understand yourself. You are who you are, and will be attractive to some women, and unattractive to others, no matter what you do, who you know or how you act. Know what it is you are genuinely attracted to in a woman. By knowing this you can eliminate wasting your time trying to woo a girl simply for the sake of it. Once you understand what type of girl you are attracted to, you need to start learning how to understand and relate to the women you are attracted to.
A big mistake that many guys make is that they give away compliments to girls too easily, quickly and often.
Learn how to read body language - hers as well as your own. Learn how to tell if she is flirting with you. Once you understand how a woman uses body language to convey her feelings, you are halfway to your goal. The ability to "read faces" is a more specific type of body language allowing you to instantly know many things about a woman just by glancing at her.
Female Body Language Tips That She Likes You:
She plays with or tosses her hair.
- She leans toward you while talking.
- She smiles when catching you checking her out.
- She keeps her eyes locked on you while she is talking to you.
- She often points in your direction with her leg, foot or shoulders.
- She fidgets with a piece of jewelry or strokes the stem of her glass when chatting with you.
- She mirrors your body movements - for example, if you rest your arm on the table, she quickly does the same.
- The best signs are when the woman you are interested in is turning her body, legs, or arms in your direction. If a woman has crossed her legs in the other direction, or is folding her arms away from you, it's best to assume she is not interested in you.
Tips to Get a Girl Interested:
Always make sure she feels safe with you and can trust you. Be open about your feelings, but do not cross the line into being pushy. Make it clear that you would like to pursue something more, but do not make her feel uncomfortable.
- Be funny without being stupid - make her laugh at things you say or do. Girls love funny guys. If you're able to make her laugh, you're halfway there. It's important to make it fun, spontaneous, and enjoyable, so she has the feeling that, when she is with you, she doesn't know what to expect. She remembers it as fun. She's always up for a surprise, and it keeps her excited. You're that excitement in her life, and she attaches that emotion to you.
- Always be sincere. Never be someone your not, always be yourself.
- Be different - You will instantly grab her attention and peak her curiosity to learn more about you.
- Keep quiet concerning her personal affairs by not sharing her private information unless she okays it.
- Tell her a story and lead her into a daydream or fantasy she enjoys, she will associate this enjoyment with you.
- Ask her questions about herself and LISTEN to what she has to say, focus the conversation on her as much as possible. Resist the urge to talk about yourself throughout an entire date. She'll learn that you aren't self-absorbed and she'll be more likely to want to talk with you and see you again.
- Try to always have a laughy face when you see her you look much better by doing so.
- Tell her about things you like to do or plans you have and see if she tries to find a way to be with you. If she shows up with no other reason to be there, you can know she's showing her support in hopes that you two get some time alone after the event.
- Charm the girl, a simple smile or even a random wink will let her know your interested and could easily sweep her off her feet. Being flirty will help keep you out of the friend zone because it will remind the girl that you're attractive as well as a good friend. Flirting is an excellent way to gauge her feelings towards you because you soon realize whether she is into you or not. You can always tell by her reactions. If she likes you she does one of two things: nothing or flirts back. If she doesn’t like you - she will back off. If she backs off, you reduce the amount of flirting you are doing at the current time and back a little off too.
- Personal Hygiene. If you want to get a woman to like you, basic cleanliness and appearance are extremely important. Girls notice things like bad breath, flab, and greasy hair before they notice that winning personality.
- Don't fade away into the background. Make sure that you are a visible person and not the wall paper. Looking good is one way of getting noticed.
- Be confident by showing confidence at all times - Ask a girl and she will tell you there is something about a man who is confident and comfortable that is attractive and intriguing to them. If you are a confidant person it will have to reflect in your body language. Keep your body language open and inviting. Maintain eye contact sit or stand in a relaxed manner. Your confidence, which is sexy, will radiate because you are happy with WHO YOU ARE, not trying to be someone else.
- Touch her (appropriately - hands, shoulders, etc.) as soon as you meet her and slowly escalate the duration and intensity of each touch. Give her time to get comfortable with your touch - if she’s not comfortable holding your hand, she’s definitely not going to be comfortable having sex with you.
- When starting to date a girl, not showing all your feelings at the start, and creating uncertainty about how much you like the girl, will make her think more about you thus increasing her interest in you. Fun and playful works much better than serious and deep. When you give a woman a little bit, then lean back, you set up a "Hey, I want more of that" situation. This is true whether you want a series of one-night stands or whether you're looking for a wife. She wants to chase you. She wants a challenge. She wants a guy she can not completely figure out. Every time she leaves you she should be wondering if she will ever see you again. She should be wondering how much you like her. She should be wondering if you're seeing other girls. That is the art of the chase. The more time she sits around wondering what you're doing - the more she begins to convince herself she is in love with you.
- Girls get bored when they receive a lot of attention from a guy, although that’s what they desire, the same things get tedious after a while. You should switch things up, tease her one night, maybe not reply to some of her texts one day, then another day talk to her a lot. Be a little stubborn, don’t always give in to what she wants but always treat her with respect.
- When starting to date a girl, not showing all of your feelings at the very beginning, and creating a bit of uncertainty about how much you like the girl, will make her think more about you thus increasing her interest in you. You can't make anyone interested in you. You have to be interesting.
- Try reading books like "The Five Love Languages", "His Needs, Her Needs", or "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Relationships Between Men and Women" and pay attention to what they say women do and don't like.
Signs a Girl Is Interested In You:
She says you’re handsome or sexy.
- She buys you food or buys you a drink.
- She becomes jealous when you talk with other women. Make yourself look wanted and desired by other women. When the woman in question sees another female's interest, it may spawn jealousy within her, making her discover emotions she never realized she had.
- She says you’d make a great couple, you look good together, anything like that.
- She asks if you live alone or with friends or roommates, and especially if she asks if they are home right now.
- A woman who's interested in you wants to know everything about you - so she can talk about you with her friends.
- She asks you where you live, especially if it comes at an unusual time in the conversation or out of the middle of nowhere.
- A girl is probably not interested in you if she always appears distracted, or loses interest in a conversation when chatting with you.
- She is on edge around you. Watch how she interacts with others. If she's only fidgety around you, then she probably likes you a lot.
- She does something physically suggestive, like taking your arm and putting it around her or taking your hand and putting it on her, or putting her hand or legs on you.
- She focuses more of her attention on you, especially if you’ve been quiet or other people are competing for her attention, but she’s still devoting a lot of attention to you.
Things NOT to Say or Do:
Don't be a drunk! If you can't control your alcohol consumption, the less likely you'll be able to use good judgment and avoid saying really stupid things around women.
- Don't be clingy - Get to know them a little but once you’ve hit a certain point back off a bit just to let her know she has to try as well, don’t fully ignore her, just act like your not interested - it’ll drive her crazy knowing that she can’t have everyone and will make her want you even more!
- Never say I'd do anything for you as sooner or later she will begin walking all over you and get mad at you if you don't do the stuff she’s asked you to do.
- Don't brag about yourself or your feats in life.
Playing Hard to Get:
Should you do it?
Does it help you when dating?
In a recent study published in "Psychological Science", women were more attracted when they were uncertain if a guy liked them a lot than when they were sure a guy really liked them. In the study female participants were more attracted to men when they were unsure if the men liked them best, than men who they knew liked them the most. What is interesting about the study is the uncertainty of attraction to that person in particular. The women were kept guessing if the men liked them the best or not. Often we have heard from friends that when dating someone, it is best not to be too enthusiastic in the beginning and reveal all of your feelings. Turns out, there might be something to that.
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